Tales of Elections Canada

As I wrote this, I sat at the Information Officer’s (IO) desk at my appointed polling station. Life there was not quite as boring as you might have though, but I will let you be the judge. So in the interest of keeping a record of my day, here is my story.

8:45 – Arrived at my polling station and began to set up.
8:55 – Found out that the Deputy Returning Officer (DRO) for one of the polling stations was missing. Much a-worrying was caused by this as the Central Poll Supervisor (CPS) ran out with the poll listing to go call her.
9:20 – My CPS returned with my poll list. As I write this, we still do not have enough listings for all the people that need it. The stations are now set up and I have determined how to correctly do my job.
9:25 – No sign of the missing DRO yet. People are arriving outside, and the Conservative scrutineers have arrived, and are setting up.
9:30 – The polls open. So officially begins my twelve hour day. I now help my first few voters and after a few early stumbles I get to understanding what I am doing.
9:43 – My first lost voter. He came to the wrong station, and with the help of my CPS we direct him to the correct place.
9:44 – After much explaining as to why we cannot help them, I notice that the poll with the missing DRO is running. The Poll Clerk (PC) is acting as the DRO and the Registration Officer (RO) is now acting as the PC.
9:50 – The official DRO replacement shows up. The RO and PC return to their normal duties.
9:53 – First major lull in voter traffic.
10:00 – The first lull ends. This occurs when the voters from the poll with the missing DRO that were originally sent to the riding headquarters return. They now vote, a little angry with us for the mix-up. Understandable.
10:07 – I start writing this journal.
10:15 – My first lost voters. He went to the wrong poll again, so we call headquarters to get him some help.
10:19 – I talk to a scrutineer that works for Flaherty and I ask him what happens if he wins, as he is the MPP for this riding. I am told if he wins, his MPP spot will be vacant and their will be a provincial by-election.
10:21 – I realize that if Judi Longfield doesn’t win, I will at least get more money by working for Elections Ontario at the by-election.
10:27 – Caught up with my journal. There may be gaps now in the journal. Oh well…
10:34 – I break into my skittles and my first ginger-ale. Stupid cold froze the skittles, so they are not as chewy as I would have liked. I found some tape to close them back up when I tired of them. So this is boring… sue me. It isn’t as bad as my parents made it out to be though.
10:41 – A guy comes in with a paper that is apparently his wife’s power of attorney. Apparently this is acceptable and he votes for his wife.
10:44 – I steal my CPS’s polling station map. This will allow me to help voters better, as is my job.
10:46 – I tell my CPS that I took it. She seems fine with this. I also discover that my skittles pack has 50 % of my recommended daily intake of vitamin C. Random.
11:13 – Broke into the first half of my pizza sub. I also finished my ginger-ale. Both were delicious, and I plan on eating the other half of the sub within the next twenty minutes.
11:51 – Had a conversation with the replacement DRO on the topic of the computer age. I realized that none of my friends are in this polling distract.
11:53 – Read a bit of The Silver Chair. I am still bored.
12:25 – Helped a guy in a wheelchair. I also finished my second ginger-ale.
12:45 – Started writing my Webcomic of the Week post.
1:08 – Finished writing Webcomic of the Week. I started on an apology letter. It is a bit slow right now.
1:21 – Finished apology letter and moved on to doodling.
1:25 – Someone is trying to vote more than once… Shame on him… He voted at an advance poll and is now trying to vote here. We are getting scammed.
1:54 – The boredom has fully set in. I am pacing around the polling station. I broke into my carrots a while back and have now moved back to my skittles. I am saddened though; no one thinks I should be working here. Everyone thinks I am too young… Oh well…
2:27 – I’m not allowed to discuss my political beliefs while I’m here. I’m supposed to be non-partisan. I wish I could say something to the people. I cannot though, even when I agree with them.
2:33 – I finished my Fruitopia. I only have 1 pop left. I must conserve it. Heh… I am rationing…
2:50 – Some nice woman came around with some tea. She then brought me some, just how I like it, and a cookie. I set up a table near mine for all the cups once people are done with them.
2:55 – Only the Conservatives seem to have sent us any scrutineers today. It is disappointing. I wanted to see more of my favorite parties, or any other party for that matter.
2:58 – Saw the first person I actually know. Kind of. I saw the father of someone I know from Sinclair. I hope to see more people that I know.
3:22 – I set my watch after finishing my tea. I now have a timer going. Only 6:07 left to vote. Hurry!
3:35 – Had a conversation with a PC on the safety of leaning back in my chair. I have finished all of my carrots and skittles.
3:54 – Listened to another person explain rejected ballots and spoiled ballots to a voter. My word this is boring…
4:04 – Started reading silver chair again. Ate a cookie my CPS gave me.
4:19 – One of the DROs gave me a candy. That was nice of her.
4:25 – Voter comes in, angry at the Conservatives. They were campaigning on Election Day, which I don’t think is allowed. I hope they get in trouble.
4:27 – Saw a friend from the wine store at my work. Got her name wrong the first time. Dang…
4:35 – Saw someone from school. He just turned eighteen, and was voting. Who says my generation doesn’t vote?
4:38 – Got my name added to the conservative complaint. I will get an e-mail with the results. Again, I hope for some kind of fine. It’s not like they don’t know better.
4:46 – The Conservatives get off. They can campaign today, as long as they are at least three hundred feet away from any polling station. One football field. Two things are wrong with that; the first is that three hundred feet is not nearly enough; they should not be able to campaign at all on Election Day. The second thing is, why is that measurement in feet? It should be measured as one hundred metres. Why is it in the imperial measurement system?
4:55 – Mom dropped in with Timothy. Brought me Swiss Chalet, and it is delicious. I’m making my CPS jealous. Got to love having a great Mom.
5:22 – Finished dinner. Absolutely delicious. The bag I left in the trash smells of Swiss Chalet sauce and is making the replacement DRO hungry. It was really good. Now I have a coke that my Mom brought me. I should be good until 9:30.
5:31 – Four hours to go. Then I will see election coverage until morning.
5:37 – A couple came into the polling station. They had their voter ID cards, and still managed to come to the wrong station. How do you manage to come to the wrong place, when your destination is printed on the card in your hand? It makes no sense.
5:45 – Another one… For crying out loud people… Look at your card!
6:00 – And yet again, I’m getting sick of this. This guy couldn’t even take simple directions.
6:08 – Oh I’m getting tired of this. Suffice it to say some people are freaking morons. Now I have someone from another city trying to vote.
6:10 – They let her vote here. She doesn’t live here but she can vote here because someone mailed her voter ID card to her daughter’s address. Some days the system disgusts me.
6:19 – Same situation again, though it is not worth arguing about when I already know the answer to my complaint. I am not bothering to write anymore about this… It is getting tiresome.
6:45 – That was a busy twenty minutes, I hope it stays this steady.
6:57 – Libertarian scrutineers showed up. My friend is the candidate for this riding, and it is about time he showed. Now for some of my friend’s brand of “right-wingedness”. Various amounts of that in store for Elections Canada.
7:45 – Liberal scrutineers finally show up.
8:00 – Libertarian scrutineers successfully remove Liberal scrutineers from the DRO tables.
8:13 – A lull, finally. I get to sit down.
8:30 – The replacement DROs transfer papers come in after twelve hours of waiting. He can now vote.
8:38 – Libertarian candidate invites me to a Conservative drinking party. I decline.
8:43 – Read through the guidelines for candidate’s representatives.
8:44 – Heard disgusting stories from Libertarian candidate.
8:46 – Dad shows up… No real reason, he is forty-five minutes early. It is nice to talk to someone for a few minutes though.
9:10 – Discussed plans with Libertarian candidate to take over our town council. Talk of jailing political enemies, building statues of ourselves and the shooting of pigeons attempting to crap on them. Would electrify statues to discourage the pigeons from roosting.
9:13 – I have noticed a decline in the quality of my performance since the Libertarian candidate arrived.
9:29 – I get invited to act as a Libertarian scrutineers after the polls close. I decline. I get ready to go home.
9:30 – The polls close and I go home.

So was my day, boring at times. Though not as bad as I was lead to believe.

Until next time…